The way I see it, healing means to make whole again. When we heal, we become more in touch with the wholeness within on a deeper level.
Healing can be defined as the process of making or becoming sound or healthy again. When we’re wounded, it takes time to heal. But with a little time and commitment, healing will come.
The Lasting Effects of Childhood
Each of us has emotional and relational wounds from childhood.
These wounds are often the result of parental neglect, unmet needs, or even abuse. Some folks may have never felt enough or appreciated for who they are, and some might have been severely neglected or actively abused by their primary caregivers. This can lead confused children to grow into confused adults who then develop coping mechanisms for their unmet needs as children.
Childhood is a wonderful time for a lot of kids, but it is also a very confusing and difficult time.
What happens at home truly has an impact on the child. It is very rare for someone to have grown up in a home where most of their emotional needs were met consistently by their parents. This is because the parents too have unmet needs they are often not aware of. And the cycle continues.
Who Am I Today?
Who we were before we were wounded is who we are now. That may be a confusing statement to wrap our minds around, but let me explain. Our child-like innocence, joy, openness, and spontaneity – these qualities still exist in us today no matter how buried they might seem at times.
Oftentimes, it is our wounding that eclipses these qualities along with our addictive or unhealthy patterns of coping with the challenges of life. Reconnecting with our inner child and healing the undeserving wounds experienced in childhood can help shape the adults we are today.
What Happens as We Heal
As we work on our wounding, with the help of a good therapist, we begin to soften in areas where we used to be rigid. We begin to find our strength in places where we often felt scared or ashamed of as a child.
Think of your wounding as the layers of an onion. As you peel back the layers, you get closer and closer to the core. At the core, we have our sense of wholeness.
When we feel whole, we know we are complete, exactly the way we are. This is very different from thinking that we are complete or trying to convince ourselves that we are OK.
When we feel complete, it is felt as a sense of inner peace and enoughness. We feel OK in a deep way, we feel grounded and settled in ourselves – comfortable in our own skin.
How Healing Connects Us More Deeply with Others
As we turn towards our pain and soften, we also begin to feel our compassion towards the wounded places within. As we approach our wounding and vulnerability with gentleness and mercy, we tend to feel a sense of peacefulness and natural self-worth within.
This doesn’t mean we aren’t responsible with our words and actions, or that we never say “sorry,” but it actually means we are no longer hard on ourselves for making mistakes. This kindness towards the “self” makes us kinder and more compassionate towards other people.
We begin to feel that we are in fact enough the way we are. We are no longer motivated by fear, shame, and guilt – but rather from true inspiration and an open heart.
The Importance of Commitment
There is something spiritual about deep healing. As our healing truly begins to change our lives for the better, we begin a completely new relationship with all there is. We begin to feel true fulfillment. And just like anything else, this is not possible without truly committing to working on ourselves.
Invest in yourself. There is nothing like deep healing to help you live a great life.
If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health and/or problematic substance use, give us a call today. Our team at Georgia Strait Women’s Clinic is ready to answer any questions you may have and can point you in the right direction.
